Spud was leafing through some travel brochures one day when his phone rang. On the other end of the line was big television show producer that was pitching the idea of getting Spud to particpate in a reality TV show they were developing. The network executive told the potato that they wanted to fly him down to the tropical island paradise of Ambergris Caye in the Central American country of Belize. Once there, he would meet up with two different females that would try to vie for his affection in the hopes of winning the heart of the world's most eligible bachelor.
The offer sounded far too good. A free trip to a sunny ocean retreat in the dead of a cold Canadian winter, and to be surrounded by fabulous babes to boot! Besides, what better spot to find romance than on an island named after a whale's intestinal fluid! Its no wonder the Ambergris Caye's chamber of commerce has unofficially renamed it 'Temptation Island'. The tater jumped at the offer and within days, landed at the tiny airstrip in San Pedro town. The potato was met at the airport and then shuttled by water taxi to a secluded resort on the northern part of the island.
When
he arrived, he was introduced to both of his admirers. First there was
Coco, a self professed sun worshipping coconut who once modeled for a
Malibu Rum label. Next there was Mandy, a juicy little mango, who once
dated the grape guy from Fruit of the Loom.
Each of the ladies would be allowed to go on a private date with the jet set tater and in that time, try their best to steal the tuber's heart.
Mandy
was the first up. On their date, the two took a stroll down the sun drenched
coastline and got to know one another. Sensing things were going well,
the mango figured she'd turn up the heat a little; suggesting that the
two share a hammock on the beach and soak up some of the sun's rays. Never
one to shy away from attention (or the opportunity for a bit of 'action'),
Spud agreed and rolled himself into the swinging love nest.
Ripe and ready, it wasn't long before Mandy was all over Spud like a toupee dipped in caramel. The 'tato was barely able to keep his peel on.
As the sun set, signaling the end of their date, the two embraced with fiery passion. Spud squeezed the mango so hard in fact that a drop of her juice spurted from the top of her head and hit him in the face. Mandy teasingly told Spud 'that was just a taste of what's to come' if he chose her, and with that, she disappeared into the shadows.
Coco learned of the highlights of Spud's first date and knew that she had her work cut out to try and seduce the tater away from the lasting impression Mandy had made.
She wasted no time by taking Spud directly to the resort's romantic waterfall pool.
Not
content to waste any time on small talk, Coco pressed her hardbody against
Spud's and proceeded to clean the inside of the tater's ear canals with
her tongue.
By the time Coco was finished with Spud, he was little more than a creamy pile of potato flesh with a big toothy grin.
Next came the hard part. Spud had to decide which of the ladies he was to select to continue cultivating a relationship with. The choice would keep the potato tossing and turning all night, considering the fine qualities of each.
Mandy was in her prime, and was the type to turn heads in the produce section at the supermarket.
Coco
was a nut; seemingly oblivious to reality and completely obsessed with
pleasuring Spud. Something the tater could grow quite fond of.
Finally, the time had come for Spud's decision. The three gathered together in the resort lounge. Mandy batted her eyelashes at Spud while Coco demonstrated how to tie knots in cherry stems using only her tongue.
Spud began to perspire heavily at the thought of making such a difficult decision.
The tato was just about to reveal his choice when Dieter, the resort's head chef, appeared out of nowhere. The crazed culinary composer saw the two enticing specimens, snatched them from the bar and whisked them away to the kitchen. Spud could only look on in disbelief.
Moments later, the apron-clad abductor returned. Spud looked on in shock as he saw his two love interests had been transformed into a fruit plate.
Spud Cousteau dives for sunken treasure!