Manitoba
Where does one go when they are trying to flee the shadow of a stalker? Well, you'd go where no one else would - in Canada, we call that place Winnipeg. The blistering heat & mosquitoes of the summer and the bitter arctic cold of the winter are attractions that don't bring in droves of tourism!
But, that's not to say that Winnipeg doesn't have it's merits. In fact, this Manitoban city is home to the Royal Canadian Mint, where all of Canada's currency is made. It was a good thing too, as Spud realized that he fled Las Vegas in such a hurry that he forgot his wallet. Well fear not, for Spud knew he could get some quick cash from the Mint.
When he had toured other manufacturing facilities (such as Dewar's distillery in Scotland and the HP Foods factory in Birmingham, England ) he had always been given free samples. Knowing that the Mint had a tour as well, Spud raced there from the airport.
During the 90 minute tour, Spud learned about how this amazing operation mints the coins and prints the money for all of Canada. The tuber even got access to the design room where all of the money is conceived and illustrated. Spud tried valiantly to convince the designers to redesign the $20 bill with his likeness, but to no avail. They said that the people depicted must be 'loonies'.
At
the tour's end, the only samples they were giving out was leftover fruitcake
from last year's staff Christmas party. Spud was disenchanted but most
of all, still broke.
In an effort to get some cash, Spud headed to the center of Winnipeg's activity - the intersection of Portage and Main streets. It is from this street corner that sprung some of Canada's greatest musicians like the Guess Who, Crash Test Dummies and Neil Young. The tuber thought he'd try to emulate these successes, so he placed his hat on the ground next to him for tips and he began whistling show tunes.
Before
long, a small group had gathered round to listen to the potato blasting
out Ethel Merman's greatest hits. His hat soon filling with coins along
with the cheers of the frenzied onlookers. Cars and trucks began slowing
down in an effort to hear the potato's performance and before long a mammoth
traffic jam ensued, attracting the attention of the Winnipeg police.
The concert came to an abrupt halt shortly thereafter when police discovered the tuber in the middle of a big production number. They noticed the tattoo and the disheveled appearance and immediately arrested the hapless side dish for loitering, disturbing the peace and busking without a license.
Winnipeg's police force think Ethel Merman is overrated.
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